Engrish at Denny’s

When I was a teenager, my brother and I developed a Christmas tradition of having dinner with our in-town friends at whatever local restaurant. The way this came about is that we traditionally had a Christmas Eve dinner with my parents, and made the family circuit on Christmas Day. On the night of Christmas, everything was always so anti-climactic that we started this. We would go to cheap, sit-down places (we were kids with very little money) and just have a great time. On such a night, we went into Denny’s and found our table. Our server, a very nice immigrant student, came to our table.

“I hope you are all having a Merry Christmas,” he said in a hard accent. We assured him that we were.

My brother commented in his teenage surliness, “Do you ever get any Jews in here that get offended by that?”

“Oh, yes,” replied our server, “We have orange, apple, and grapefruit.”

I was certain, as I am to this day, that all of their juices were quite offended by Christmas.

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4 thoughts on “Engrish at Denny’s

  1. LOL!! Your brother’s almost-joke backfired on him. Reminds of this joke (no need to spew the entire joke, when just the punchline will do):

    Dr. Chin: [to patient] you have Ed Zachary disease.

    Patient: “Ed Zachary” disease? What the hell is “Ed Zachary” disease????

    Dr. Chin: it disease where your face rook ed zachary rike your ass.

  2. See, in my perfect world, we get to laugh at each other and ourselves without getting offended. I’ve had people laugh at my bad Spanish, and that’s fair. My Spanish is muy malo! I’ll own that. Why do people have to take everything so seriously anyway?


  3. I don’t know, dude. I don’t take myself seriously and I don’t get offended at racial jokes if they’re not intended to be personal attacks.

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