Alright.  It’s just now feeling real.  I know that’s normal and natural, but it doesn’t feel right.  He’s gone.  I won’t see him until the next life.  It’s not fair, no matter how many decades he had with us.  Five short years ago he could do anything.  Now, he’s gone.  This is not right.  I carried his coffin today.  His makeup was cakey and cheesy.  Why did 90 have to be the line?

I really am alright, but I feel like I’ve been stolen from. Please feel free to disregard this post.  G’nite all.

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14 thoughts on “Grandpa

  1. You’re right, Michael, and you’re also right in how you feel.

    Wish I was smart enough and eloquent enough to say something that would bring some sort of peace or comfort to you, but I’m just not that smart. All I can say is that if you need to talk, give me a call.

    You and your family are in my prayers, brother.

    • Thank you Instinct. That means a lot. Frankly, I feel a whole lot better, simply having gotten that off my chest.

  2. I promise it will get easier with time. Not better but a bit easier. Remember him with laughter and love.
    We love you and will be here if you need anything.

  3. Its been six years and 1.9 kids since my last grand parent (maternal grand mother) passed.

    I carried her coffin at the family cemetery in Sault Ste Marie Michigan. She was laid to rest next to her husband some 20 years later.

    I try to go up there (about 300 miles away) every year or so to visit, never fails to tear me up.

    I’d like to say time heals all wounds, but it just dulls the pain, the wound will be there, but its a testament to what they meant to you. Also, like all good scars makes you a smarter and better person for having it.

    • It’s not like we don’t know that there are others that have had similar experiences, but it does help to hear it. Thanks for your comments.

  4. i know *exactly* how you feel. the logical part of your brain grasps that he was old and it was his time, but the emotional part of your brain is angry and sad, and doesn’t want to understand. it isn’t fair.

    your family’s in my thoughts. <3

  5. Been a bit over 3 years since my Dad passed, been about a year since one of my grandfathers passed. I know how y’all feel, and there are no words in any human language that can ease the pain.

    Prayin for y’all.

  6. All I can do is wish luck and offer prayers and thoughts. Remember, you had decades with him. He had the chance to (I assume) meet his grandchildren and see them grow. From Jennifer’s post, it sounds like he took his share of hurdles and topped them, running the race out longer than anyone else anticipated. No man can live forever on this world, but he had the chance and option to raise and guide his family and flock. That legacy is probably as close as any mortal man can get.

  7. My condolences.

    Dude, you are doing better than I would be.

    Hang in there.

    (BTW, this explains why I can’t reach you).

    Hope your grief cycle doesn’t take you to places that are best left alone.

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