Baconnaise

Many of you probably know that we here at the Evyl Robot Empyre are fans of bacon. Probably the greatest bacon fan of the three of us is Teen Bot, who loves to receive bacon products and bacon themed products as gifts, even for major landmarks and holidays. Recently, he convinced his grandparents to pick up a jar of Baconnaise when he went to the grocery store with them.

jar

At their house, I had the opportunity to try some of this on a sandwich. It has a very odd, vaguely bacon flavor which probably leans a little to hard on the salt and smoke flavors. Something that struck me as odd was this mark on the back label:

Kosher

Wait. *head scratch* If I’m not mistaken, bacon is a pork product. And although I’m not Jewish, I do believe that pork is not included in a Kosher diet. Sooooooo, what’s in this crap?

ingredients

Sorry about the focus. The above ingredients label reads: soybean oil, water, egg yolk, gluconic acid, salt, autolyzed yeast extract, cellulose gel, modified food starch (from corn), maltodextrin, cultured dextrose, sugar, dehydrated garlic, paprika, dehydrated onion, spice, xanthan gum, guar gum, gum accia, natural smoke flavor, natural flavors (contain milk), tocopherols (vitamin-E to protect flavor), calcium disodium EDTA (to protect flavor).

AND NO BACON!!! And, what is ‘cultured dextrose’? Can it speak more than one language and understand fine arts? I believe I’ll stick to regular mayonnaise and add bacon strips to my sandwich if I see fit. If you want really good mayo, you could even make your own at home. I’ve used a variation on Alton Brown’s recipe, which can be found here. That’s right, a few ingredients worth less than a buck can be converted into nine ounces of home made mayonnaise in about ten minutes. And, it’s fun! Make a little more than that, and it will keep for a few days in a jar in your refrigerator. Try it with your kids. I will admit that I use store-bought mayo, but it’s only because of the convenience. An unopened jar will store at room temperature for long beyond its printed expiration date, and when I want to use it, I have to wash the knife I spread it with without the addition of whatever I whipped it up with and in. Leave the Baconnaise to Jewish people who want to know what bacon vaguely tastes like without violating their faith.

2 thoughts on “Baconnaise

  1. Fresh mayo is way better than any crap you can buy. The shelf life is shorter but that is good right fresh products don’t last forever like the store bought in my book that is a thumbs up. As for this stuff, your very brave!

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